"The only difference between me and a madman is that I am not mad"

"The difference between false memories and true ones is the same as for jewels: it is always the false ones that look the most real, the most brilliant."

"It is not necessary for the public to know whether I am joking or whether I am serious, just as it is not necessary for me to know it myself."

"Have no fear of perfection -- you will never reach it."

"There is only one difference between a madman and me. I am not mad."

"The first man to compare the cheeks of a young woman to a rose was obviously a poet; the first to repeat it was possibly an idiot."

"Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton."

"To see what is right and not to do it, is want of courage."

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."

"The only way to have a friend is to be one."

"I am here and you will know that I am the best and will hear me."

"Happiness is a warm puppy."