"When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall looking frantic."

"There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot."

"Today I met with a subliminal advertising executive for just a second."

"It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature."

"They say the sun never sets over the British Empire, but it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded."

"If a word in the dictionary were mispelled, how would we know?"

"He that fears your presence will hate you absence."

"Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time."

"Dont' play for safety- it's the most dangerous thing in the world."

"I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them."

"I believe in one thing only, the power of the human will."

"The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall."