"When someone asks you a question and you don't know the answer just yell, 'Figure it out!'"

"If you do not think about the future, you cannot have one."

"It is a pleasure to give advice, humiliating to need it, normal to ignore it."

"Funny how people despise platitudes, when they are usually the truest thing going. A thing has to be pretty true before it gets to be a platitude."

"When we are chafed and fretted by small cares, a look at the stars will show us the littleness of our own intersts."

"Great anger is more destructive than the sword"

"There is no gravity. The earth sucks."

"I used to [have regrets]. But I forgave myself. When God forgave me, I figured I'd better do it, too."

"Before you were conceived I wanted you. Before you were born I loved you. Before you were here an hour I would die for you. This is the miracle of life."

"The Self when it appears behind the universe is called God. The same Self when it appears behind this little universe-the body-is the soul."

"Laugh, and the world laughs with you; Weep, and you weep alone. For the sad old earth must borrow its mirth, But has trouble enough of its own."

"One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain't nothin' can beat teamwork."